Another year older, but not just any age—a quarter of a
century!
When I think back to when I was in high school, imagining
myself being 25, I always thought that I’d have my life all figured out and that
I’d be settled down in a steady job. Honestly though, I couldn’t be happier to
be where I am today. Even though I have no idea what I want to do after I
finish Peace Corps, I have had the opportunity to just live in the moment with
very few responsibilities (besides myself and my work).
As with most birthdays, I don’t feel any older. Yeah sure,
my back and knees hurt sometimes (thanks for that steeplechase), and I may not have the same quick metabolism,
but, as the saying goes, “you’re as old as you feel…or think you are…or
something like that.” No, I like to think of it as having more experiences
under my wings and stories to tell my nieces/nephews. I’m fulfilling my dream—livin’
it up in a third world country and doing work with the purpose of helping
others as best I can. I get to walk outside my door every day and experience a
culture different than the one I grew up in—one that challenges, frustrates,
empowers, and invigorates me. Every day is a giant question mark of what I’ll
get into for the day, who will come visit me, what kind of surprise cultural
lesson I’ll learn, what food I’ll find in the village, or what bug I’ll find in
my house. There are so many new experiences all the time.
And then there’s that constant reminder—facebook, instagram,
messages—that things are happening back home. My friends are getting engaged
and married, other are already having babies. Some friends are living the adult
life and buying homes and others are graduating colleges/grad schools and getting
exciting new jobs. My sisters’ babies are growing up and one is close to
walking and talking—yet I’ve never even met him. I see all these posts and,
while I’m happy my friends and family are happy, I think “whew, I’m glad it’s
them and not me.”
I can’t imagine settling down right now; staying in one
place simply does not sound appealing. Of course there’s nothing wrong with wanting
that, to each his own. However, somewhere between studying abroad in college
and not having any idea what my specific calling in life is, I developed a pull
toward wandering about and capturing the beauty in the people, cultures, and
places around me. And I’m so happy with my current life of every week or so,
packing up a backpack and trudging 3 miles down to the road to hitch a ride or
hop in a mini bus for my next adventure. I literally have packing lists
littering every corner of my house it seems. I have a giant calendar on my wall
that I use to track my ever-busy schedule of traveling to this city or this
village or to this training or whatever! I’d rather be spending my savings on
flights to new lands, trying unique foods in new places, jumping off bridges,
or snorkeling in bright blue waters. This burning desire to constantly be
traveling and doing new things may seem like an immature thought—like I just don’t
want to enter the “real world”—but I see it in a different light. I see it as a
craving to experience as much as can while I don’t have attachments. As a need
to understand the world around me so that I can better find my place in it. As
a yearning to see how other people think and what they belief while my mind is
still young and forming its’ opinions and attitudes. I see it as a way to challenge
myself to break down barriers that I have put up on what I can and can’t do and
free myself of personal and societal expectations. It’s my way of proving to
people that it’s okay to not have it all figured out and that you can live
through that time of uncertainty instead of doing what everyone expects of you.
It’s always more fun to never know what’s around the corner or where you’ll be
exploring next!
All this to say, I can’t think of a better way to have spent
my 25th birthday than wandering around Zanzibar Island off the coast
of Tanzania and tasting new foods and drinks, learning bits and pieces of a new
language, facing fears, and experiencing a new culture and a new place.
